Really, I just wanted a deck to battle folks through video chat or at my LGS - in this case, the gold-bordered cards are perfectly acceptable
Its because heat and bright light can cause discoloration and drying of the cards
Apart from mutate cards to trigger that ability, I guess you could use Stuffy Doll and Brash Taunter, or fill your deck with cards that grant abilities to your commander like backgrounds and the legendary familiars (Kediss, Falthis, et al)
Then include answers to those exact things
[cards] Kappa Cannoneer Wurmcoil Engine Phyrexian Metamorph [/cards] Large artifact threats like [card]Kappa Cannoneer[/card] and [card]Wurmcoil Engine[/card] apply consistent pressure while forcing awkward blocks and removal decisions
Thankfully, the evil tone makes for some incredible artwork and card designs, because thats the stuff that many players are here for